By Felicia Pride

There's a phenomenon sweeping the African American community: Black men traveling to places like Brazil and the Dominican Republic for sex. A new book Don't Blame It on Rio: The Real Deal Behind Why Men Go to Brazil for Sex (Grand Central Publishing, April 2008) by Jewel Woods and Karen Hunter attempts to get to the heart of this issue and show that it's bigger than "getting some." More than Words spoke with Woods who also founded the Renaissance Male Project, a nonprofit advocacy and accountability organization for men and boys. Check out this eye-opening, eyebrow-raising interview with Woods about sex, love, and the widening divide between African American men and women. And when you're finished, click here to read an excerpt of Don't Blame It on Rio.

More than Words: The idea for Don't Blame it on Rio stemmed from the question, "Are black women necessary?" What factors contributed to this point in time when such a question even exists?

Jewel Woods: To be specific, the question "Are black women necessary?" was the direct result of what many men were asking or raising explicitly. In a broader sense, the question is rooted in the social facts that we are all aware of regarding the decline in marriage, the high rates of divorce and separation, the disproportionate rates of inter-racial marriage, and so on. However, most discussions about black men, marriage and relationships focus on poor and working poor men and their inability to be providers or the "strain" of not being able to assume traditional roles within the family. Very few discussion look at the group of black men with stable jobs or the group commonly referred to as the Love Jones Cohort that are increasingly single and living alone to examine what their issues are with building and sustaining long term relationships.

So taking a more expansive view, the question "Are black women necessary?" seeks to address the question: If men are not thinking of black women as partners, spouses, or as being in long term relationships, then what are they thinking of black women as? More importantly, what attitudes, belief systems, and values will replace the historical roles women played in men's lives?

http://www.blackvoices.com/blogs/2008/05/09/dont-blame-...-men-and-sex-abroad/

Chapter Excerpt

http://www.hachettebookgroupusa.com/8524869F482348F0B7DDCE6760829811.htm

Does the book cover the high rate of HIV infections in Brasil? Highest on the continent?

I know the women down there are finer then frogs hair. But the HIV is down there heavy! It is just not worth it.

Okay which one of you Pirates or Spartans were interviewed for this book?

quote:

A lot of black men that go there and come back start to expect something different sexually. If anything, my libido has increased. I might not have the physical prowess, but certainly I am stimulated to have sex at least once a day.

—Bill, 48, claims adjustor, Norfolk

Before you say it, it was not me. Check with JayT or Q or Shere:

quote:

This brother lives in Atlanta, and I can still call him and talk to him, find out what’s going on out in Atlanta. It’s just like that. I did my best networking when I was in Brazil.

—Tank, 37, hospital salesman, Oakland

Naw seriously though going to Brazil or any other country is no different than when all women groups got together to travel to Jamaica or the other islands in the west indies. When I was a kid I found out why my grandma made so much money running trips to the Bahamas and West Indies. She always had a full plane of black and white women looking for Dexter St. Jacque. White men were puzzled when their women came back to the states with their hair twisted in locks. They even believed the lie their women told them about the whole Bo Derek thing or it was just easier to manage and keep a style with all the swimming and salt water. More like all the hot sweat dripping from getting tossed around all night by a chocolate mandingo (I'll give you ladies and a couple of you fellas -you know who you are- a chance to return from your day dream).

Anywho, dudes are going somewhere whether its the Dutch Antilles, Brazil or DR to get their freak on.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: PapaGrizzly,

Are black women necessary Are Black women NECESSARY?!! What dumbass would ask such a stupid question. Should ask the MoFo if he is necessary.


Now tell me about the Dominican Republic

This message has been edited. Last edited by: aggiejazz,

quote:

Originally posted by PapaGrizzly:

Naw seriously though going to Brazil or any other country is no different than when all women groups got together to travel to Jamaica or the other islands in the west indies. When I was a kid I found out why my grandma made so much money running trips to the Bahamas and West Indies. She always had a full plane of black and white women looking for Dexter St. Jacque. White men were puzzled when their women came back to the states with their hair twisted in locks. They even believed the lie their women told them about the whole Bo Derek thing or it was just easier to manage and keep a style with all the swimming and salt water. More like all the hot sweat dripping from getting tossed around all night by a chocolate mandingo (I'll give you ladies and a couple of you fellas -you know who you are- a chance to return from your day dream).

Anywho, dudes are going somewhere whether its the Dutch Antilles, Brazil or DR to get their freak on.

I certainly agree. I think the pendulum is finally starting to swing the other direction from the "there are no good black men" rhetoric we were hearing for some years. As more women ( and Black women specifically) show themselves to be trifling we will get more of this.

quote:

Originally posted by aggiejazz:
Are black women necessary Are Black women NECEASSARY?!! What dumbass would ask such a stupid question.

The dumbass who was never ever ever given the time of day by Black women, wouldn't never get the time of day from Black women even if they were the last men on Earth and knowing that he as options that can/will be exercised.

quote:

Originally posted by PapaGrizzly:

Before you say it, it was not me. Check with JayT or Q or Shere:

no you didn't nucca!

Man, women have been going to the tropics for years. In packs. And they aren't doing it just for the sun and sand. I've spoken to a few women who admit that it's a real good time to get their freak on, especially in Jamaica. Looking for that special "Winston"! So what's the problem with men going down to do the same? (Using condoms, of course. Female condoms as well! )
I got male friends that travel to the Dominican Republic, Belize, Costa Rica and Martinique every other month. EVERY OTHER MONTH! Some even got timeshare down there!
When they come back, they are relaxed, estatic about their trip. And they look forward to going back.
So I don't really see the difference. Women been taking these trips since forever. Men are just catching on!

My how Stella and her exhaling posse got real quiet. Hey punchy maybe we are the only ones who knew their dirty little secret double standard. See when you know the deal you can kill all the noise. I posted the same thing on AOL. Not one woman has dared say anything to even try and contradict it or even speak on it. The Pimp Hand is strong.

I guess they slowed down when Terri brought back a gay Dexter.

quote:

Originally posted by PapaGrizzly:
My how Stella and her exhaling posse got real quiet. Hey punchy maybe we are the only ones who knew their dirty little secret double standard. See when you know the deal you can kill all the noise. I posted the same thing on AOL. Not one woman has dared say anything to even try and contradict it or even speak on it. The Pimp Hand is strong.

I guess they slowed down when Terri brought back a gay Dexter.

EXACTLY! I wondered why we haven't received a female synopsis on this phenomenon that's catching on with black men; I guess you have a point, Papa Griz!

Well...WHO CARES! Folks are grown and can go do what they want. Ain't nobody got to love it or like it...they can only complain about it after they learn about it.

WTF do they mean "are black women necessary"?

Anywho, I wouldn't spend free money in support of this "project" or "book".

Men can travel back and forth here or there, that's there business. I know many men who've gone and who plan to go. All I know is there's one on this earth who better not try me.

quote:

Originally posted by Essence:
WTF do they mean "are black women necessary"?

Anywho, I wouldn't spend free money in support of this "project" or "book".

Men can travel back and forth here or there, that's there business. I know many men who've gone and who plan to go. All I know is there's one on this earth who better not try me.

Which one would that be? Would this be someone you know personally?

No, I'm just a crazy, unnecessary black woman.

quote:

Originally posted by Essence:

No, I'm just a crazy, unnecessary black woman.

Oh, on the contrary, you're very, very necessary! Going to BlackBikeWeek next weekend?

Is that next weekend? Wow!!

I'll probably roll down there Saturday afternoon, but I won't be staying (my brother lives at the beach, so I'll crash with him if we get too lazy to drive back).

If nothing else, I will be hitting Crabby Mike's Calabash. Yes, I'm greedy. LOL

Those Brown Prado sisters down in Brazil are mixed with a bunch of blood...

Well if people did what they had to do in the bedroom, people wouldn't be goin 2 Brazil or Jamaica or the Dominican Republic to "get their groove back" or on.

This goes for men AND women.

^^That song and dance is sooooo tired. People will use that line and the "I'm tired of the same ol stuff" line until the end of time.

If people put the energy into their relationship that they put into seeking comfort outside, they'd be surprised at what they get.